Thursday, July 10, 2008

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Sunday, March 12, 2006
Hi, I'm Jerry
The way you introduce yourself says a lot about you.
Let's say you're at a party. Well, the party's actually in the apartment that you live in.
But you arrived just as it was getting good. By opening your door and leaving your room.
You nod at your roommates, who yell and say something about seeing you for the first time in a week. They are very excited about this. There is loud music playing but they are so excited that you can hear them yelling, "Come meet our roommate Jerry. He's fucking hilarious. We haven't seen him in a week."
Your roommates bring over a guy you've never seen before. Since you don't know him, you dislike him already. You reach out to shake this douchebag's hand.
He says his name but you forget it 5 seconds later, because you don't give a shit.
He tells you where he's from and what he's doing here, but who fucking cares. You're about to tell him who you are.
"Hi," you say. "I'm Jerry. I live here. I'm a junior majoring in studio art. I was supposed to be a senior pre-med. That didn't work out. I haven't taken a shower since the last time my roommates saw me and I just jacked off."
This douchebag, he looks at you, and down at his hand.
Then everyone bursts out laughing, including you. You just laugh a little harder than the rest of them.
posted by Jerry at 8:40 AM 0 comments

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